(Posted Sep 1, 02:40 PM by Zac)
As one might imagine, I’ve had plenty of time to think while out upon the open road. As I theorized before leaving on this trip, such occasions are pristene opportunities for rational introspection. Countless minutes to ponder and disect the intangibles of life.
The more I think of my education, my schooling, my academic college experience, the more I feel like it’s just a backup plan. Like becoming an engineer is what I’ll do if I can’t find something I truely enjoy. That’s not to say that I don’t believe I’d make a good engineer – I’m sure I’d be more than capable of handling whatever might be thrown at me – I just don’t want to spend my life sitting in a cube, wasting away my life under the dull shadow of flourescent lights.
On any reasonable timeline a human life is a dot. That’s all. Nothing more. It doesn’t span generations (obviously) or evolutionary leaps. Our lives are simply such a short departure from the alternative that I don’t believe we have enough time to fuck around. Every moment counts. I don’t want to look back on my life and remember all the things I wish I’d done. I don’t want to live in regret.
So what would I like to do? Everything. Nothing. I’d like to experience a variety of occupations, and live in a variety of places. I’d like to spend a year as a truck driver, and then spend a year living in South America. I’d like to be a fire-fighter, a climbing instructor, a struggling musician. I want to travel the country, write books, take pictures. Race cars and motorcycles. Teach. Ponder. Fly.
The problem is that jumping around from job to job, state to state, country to country has its drawbacks. No job security. No foundation. Slightly too chaotic. I need some kind of footing to fall back on, a reference point in life. So where do I go from here?
As I see it, the first step would be to establish a lifestyle substructure. Perhaps owning my own business, and building it up to the point where I could telecommute. Ideally something that I’d enjoy, something exciting and dynamic. Operating a track-day business comes to mind, but there are a plethora of ‘what-if’s’ and contingent factors. However, if ultimately viable and successful, that would be perfect.
Where I go from here is clearly up to me. I’ll finish my sentence at Santa Clara and probably get some entry-level engineering position to fill the time. Hopefully not for long. I don’t want to become a wage slave, a design zombie. I’ll need to take the initiative and work towards my ultimate goal, whatever that may be. Golden opportunities aren’t found, they’re forged with blood and sweat.
Today’s ramblings are the genesis of tomorrow’s actions. In the words of T.E. Lawrence, “The dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, and make it possible.”
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